Автор Тема: Military Humour  (Прочитано 11208 раз)

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Re: Military Humour
« Ответ #165 : 08 Март 2018, 10:48:50 »
Was it really?

I do think so. But shouldn't it have been : "So am I" ?

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Re: Military Humour
« Ответ #164 : 08 Март 2018, 01:31:59 »
A snappy answer that was!

Was it really?

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Re: Military Humour
« Ответ #163 : 06 Март 2018, 23:26:32 »
   
  Both Were on Duty

     An officer parked his car in "No Rarking" zone. To be on the safe side, he put on a note:"Pardon me. Am here on duty."
     When he came back, he found near his note an MP's ticket:"Pardon me. So do I."

A snappy answer that was!

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Re: Military Humour
« Ответ #162 : 06 Март 2018, 01:56:27 »
   
  Both Were on Duty

     An officer parked his car in "No Rarking" zone. To be on the safe side, he put on a note:"Pardon me. Am here on duty."
     When he came back, he found near his note an MP's ticket:"Pardon me. So am I."

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Re: Military Humour
« Ответ #161 : 04 Март 2018, 10:55:20 »
Skipping Dinner

A certain colonel, with a well-earned reputation, phoned his wife one evening shortly after 7. "I'll have to skip dinner again darling," he told her. "I am working on something very important."

"Why don't you bring the work home with you?" suggested his wife, acidly. "I'd like to meet her,too."

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Re: Military Humour
« Ответ #160 : 20 Февраль 2018, 20:23:00 »
Drop of Blood

The Congressman was delivering a windy speech of welcome to some soldiers back from the war.

"We are really one, my friends," he declared pompously, "in that we all love our country dearly and are willing to shed our last drop of blood for it."

"Did you ever notice," whispered one soldier to another," that those who are always shouting about shedding their last drop of blood are never the ones to shed the first?"


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Re: Military Humour
« Ответ #159 : 14 Февраль 2018, 09:58:56 »
In a Military Hospital

     Patient:"But, doctor, are you sure I'll be better? I have heard of cases where the doctor has made a wrong diagnosis and treated someone of pneumonia who afterward died of typhoid fever."
     Doctor:"Nonsense! When I treat a patient for pneumonia, he dies of pneumonia."

 A real professional in his field !

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Re: Military Humour
« Ответ #158 : 13 Февраль 2018, 00:54:05 »
An Ultimatum

One soldier to another: "If you don't stop telling lies about me, I will start telling truth about you."
     Good answer! It could be used in civilian life, too.

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Re: Military Humour
« Ответ #157 : 09 Февраль 2018, 22:03:45 »
An Ultimatum

One soldier to another: "If you don't stop telling lies about me, I will start telling truth about you."

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Re: Military Humour
« Ответ #156 : 09 Февраль 2018, 00:19:46 »
In a Military Hospital

     Patient:"But, doctor, are you sure I'll be better? I have heard of cases where the doctor has made a wrong diagnosis and treated someone of pneumonia who afterward died of typhoid fever."
     Doctor:"Nonsense! When I treat a patient for pneumonia, he dies of pneumonia."

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Re: Military Humour
« Ответ #155 : 03 Февраль 2018, 13:09:35 »
Optimism and Pessimism

Flying instructors say that pilot trainees are divided into optimists and pessismists when reporting the amount of fuel during flights. Optimists report that their fuel tank is half full while pessimists say it's half empty.

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Re: Military Humour
« Ответ #154 : 03 Февраль 2018, 12:59:11 »
Air Courage

     A very bashful young sergeant didn't dare to speak to a girl who was a passenger of the plane flying high in the air.
     At last he summoned his courage and asked: "Pardon, you are also flying in this plane?"

Some men sometimes feel awkward and say do ridiculous things due to embarassment.
Do you?

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Re: Military Humour
« Ответ #153 : 03 Февраль 2018, 01:30:00 »
Air Courage

     A very bashful young sergeant didn't dare to speak to a girl who was a passenger of the plane flying high in the air.
     At last he summoned his courage and asked: "Pardon, you are also flying in this plane?"

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Re: Military Humour
« Ответ #152 : 22 Январь 2018, 03:58:52 »
I used to know someone like that

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Re: Military Humour
« Ответ #151 : 21 Январь 2018, 22:28:07 »
     
One Lieutenant to Another

     "Is your wife economical?"
     "Sometimes. She had only twenty six candles on her fortieth birthday last night."