Тонкий английский юмор

[Ann]

Interesting approach, I didn't notice there were so many examples of Continuous tenses here.

    You can teach people many things using jokes.

[DAS]

    After looking through the jokes of this branch I found the one which I used to use when teaching my students Continuous
forms.

Interesting approach, I didn't notice there were so many examples of Continuous tenses here.

[Ann]

"Thomas, what is the matter with your brother?" asked the mother of the boys.
"He's crying," replied Thomas, "because I'm eating my cake and won't give him any."
"Is his own cake finished?" asked the mother.
"Yes, and he was crying when I was eating that, too."

    After looking through the jokes of this branch I found the one which I used to use when teaching my students Continuous
forms.

[DAS]

"Your husband boasts he runs things in his family."

"He does - the lawn mower, the washing machine, vacuum cleaner, baby carriage and the errands."

[DAS]

"I'm glad I attended your lectures on insomnia, doctor."

"Did you find them interesting?"

"No, but they have cured my insomnia."

[DAS]

"And what were you before you married?"

"A Housemaid."

"And the change is a pleasant one?"

"The change isn't much - I just work for nothing now."

[Ann]

Every Medal Has Its Reverse

     "How is your daughter doing in America?"
     "Great! She married a nice American boy. He helps her with the cleaning, washes the dishes, looks after the baby when she wants to go out  -  in fact, he does everything for her."
     "And how is your son doing?"
     "Poor  boy! He married a slut of an American girl. He must help her with the cleaning, wash the dishes, look after the baby when she goes out  -  in fact, he has to do everything for the hussy."

[DAS]

The millionaire, examining a prospective son-in-law, demanded:

"Would you love my Gwendolyn just as much if she were poor?"

"Certainly, sir."

"You've said enough. We don't want any fools in this family."

[DAS]

     

"I have a hair-raising story."
     " Tell it to some bald-headed man."

A snappy answer!

[Ann]

     

"I have a hair-raising story."
     " Tell it to some bald-headed man."

[DAS]

"Broken off your engagement to Mary?"

"She wouldn't have me."

"Did you tell her about your rich uncle?"

"Yes. She is my aunt now."

[DAS]

     One of the best jokes!

Ann, thanks a bunch!

[Ann]

Father: "My boy, I never kissed a girl until I met your mother. Will you be able to say the same thing to your son?"

Son: "Yes, but not with such a straight face."

     One of the best jokes!

[DAS]

Father: "My boy, I never kissed a girl until I met your mother. Will you be able to say the same thing to your son?"

Son: "Yes, but not with such a straight face."

[DAS]

On Keeping Secrecy

     Some people's idea on keeping a secret is to refuse to tell who tell it to them.

I've never come across such phenomena. However, I do believe there are quite a number of people of that kind.